Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Just another day............
I wondered if that was a bad thing; ya know, not stopping to honor the day. But then, I got to thinking. What's so bad about moving on? I think it's okay not to yank yourself out of feeling good just for the sake of "remembering."
Trust me, I remember. It's the remembering that brings me down. And I could stay there; I could. The comfort of the darkness calling out to me like a warm blanket. The nobility of having "survived." I got lucky - for sure.
But sometimes, if I let myself, I can see it all - the horror of things no one should ever see. Ya see, going there keeps me there and I don't want to be there today. Eleven years ago, I could've packed it in and lived a life of being a "9/11 Survivor." And, believe me, it was tempting. I'm a natural storyteller, so telling my story to anyone who would listen made me feel good. I felt special. A part of something. And I probably could have fed off of that forever.
But my life didn't end on September 11th. I am alive and to be a survivor means you to have to move on and make your life whole. I saw things on that day that I will never forget, but I've also seen wonderful things like the Taj Mahal and my smiling nieces. When I look back on my life, I want to see more than just one story. I want to see my whole life.
So today is like any other. I remember; but I keep going because I am a survivor.
I don't think so. I think it's okay not